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‘Nothing is free’ says man who just paid $6 billion to not buy any submarines

Prime Minister Scott Morrison has today declared making RAT’s free a silly idea, asking why a government would hand out free things to everyone when 60% of those people are never going to vote for them.

“It’s just not economically workable,” explained Morrison. “We don’t have any money left after buying those car parks, a block of dirt in Western Sydney and making a small donation to a blind trust.”

The Prime Minister also explained that Australia is still reeling from the expenses from when they scrapped the $90B submarine deal with France after spending $6B to not buy any submarines.

A government insider has since revealed the main reason France was cut out of the deal was the government didn’t want the deal to be a FRAKUS.

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