Prime Minister Scott Morrison has been drafted into Australia’s Olympic dodgeball team today, after recruiters witnessed footage of the Prime Minister dodging every question journalists threw at him during his National Press Club appearance, alongside a lifetime of career highlights where he has shown a natural talent for dodgy activities.
“The man has a gift,” said the coach, “I’ve always said ‘if you can dodge questions, you can dodge a ball’ and that man has managed to dodge questions his entire career. It’s astounding.”
“He can dodge just about anything thrown his way. You name it, he has dodged it. I’m talking emergencies, responsibility, hoses; the man’s a dodging machine.”
“Not only can he avoid being hit by things, he can always find a way to throw them right back at other people. It doesn’t matter how overwhelming the situation, he can always find someone to take the hit instead. Hell, one time he just stayed home and sent his wife Jenny to take the hits. We didn’t even know that was allowed.”
Mr Morrison told reporters that he is excited to be part of the team and hoped that training would give him a chance to dodge the few sitting days of parliament this year.