Prime Minister and ‘working class dress-up’ enthusiast Scott Morrison has today slammed ‘inner city elites’ saying that they won’t be the ones fighting against climate change. The Pm claimed he knew this was true after citing ‘years of experience not fighting climate change myself’.
“Inner city elites and their constant exclusive events won’t do anything to fight climate change,” said the pm at an exclusive inner city event, “and that is how we like it.”
“These people just grow up privileged only experiencing the inner city surrounded by other egotistical elites, and that is why we love them. My whole political career I have worked alongside some of the best inner city elites and we have done everything we can to support coal. Even the inner city elites we send to regional electorates to pretend represent regional Australia, those blokes do amazing work pretending to care about their electorate’s issues.”
“Keep in mind lads, I don’t like all the inner city elites in this job. Malcom can obviously shove it. I mean what’s this nonsense about reducing coal usage to reduce emissions? That could drive down coal profits, I could have sworn we had already made him realise he shouldn’t follow any of his beliefs back when he was pm? I swear it’s like some inner city elites forgot the age old rule that you never designer-dog the boys!”